Home Improvement

"Home-ownership is not for sissies." This is the title of a facebook photo album from one of my friends. If there's one thing I have learned in the past seven months, it's that she's RIGHT! But as Dave Ramsey says, "If you have money, owning a home is a blessing." I have also learned (as I anticipated) that it is so freeing to own my home. While we do have money in savings, we are making small improvements along the way and saving the rest of the money for actual emergencies. You never know when something will hit, so it's best to be prepared. With that said, I would like to show a few photos of what we've been able to do with our new home. A lot of what we've done has more to do with proper furniture, than with actually "fixing" the house, but it has made a difference to us. So here it is!  

I wish I had a before picture of this, and I probably do have one somewhere. But suffice it to say that the new tv stand and blue color have made this space look WAY better. 

The magic couch!

It's a couch, bed and storage all in one!

My favorite room in the house. It's a place for the kids on this side...

....and a place for business, crafting (please forgive the curtains in progress there on the ironing board and rocking chair) and entertainment on the other side. I love that the kids are not banished to their rooms to play with their toys. And, this room leads to the backyard where our small pool and sand box await their pleasure.

Speaking of the backyard, this may be the only actual fix on the house. The added on space did not have weep screed, so, we are making sure things get done correctly!

The boys' bunk beds! Callan isn't in there yet, but Asher was ready for a big boy bed, so we saved the step of getting a twin, and went straight for the fun bunks! The color is a stain from ikea that we LOVE!

Audrey's dresser. Can it get any pinker? She does not get to choose wall colors, so I thought I would let her choose the color of her furniture. She loves it, and that makes me happy, but gosh darn, it is SO PINK! Haha! The boys have the same dresser but we also stained that green to match their bed.

We needed a place other than the refrigerator to hang the kids' art and future schooling achievements. This is an empty, and oddly placed wall in our kitchen; the perfect place for such a need! Some sort of fun, childish sign would go well above it, but I just hung it yesterday, so, it shall wait. :) 

There is still a lot to be done, but like I said, we're taking it slowly. As time, inspiration and money dictate, our house will continue to transform into our home. I look forward to making it ours, right down to the little details.

Crazy Busy

This is the second week in a row that we have not made any progress towards homeschooling other than when opportunity presents itself. We did manage to set the kids up with a summer reading program at the library. Both Audrey and Asher LOVE the library, though Asher has a difficult time with the "quiet" aspect, haha. Once the program is completed, the kids will get a free ticket to a water park in town, which will definitely be on the list of summer highlights.
As for what has been keeping us busy, last week I was planning a friend's baby shower (she's have twin girls!) And this week has been fraught with home projects, day trips, and vehicle mishaps. Nonetheless, I have some fun family pictures to share.
My favorite day this past week was when we went up the nearby mountains. From our front door to the top of the mountain was only an hour drive. Eli and I kept asking ourselves why we don't take advantage of going up the mountain more often. Here in the Valley of Tucson, it's been triple digits every single day since June first. On top of the mountain, the weather is cooler, and shaded! There are trees up there! So, on a whim, we packed up the kids and drove to a veritable paradise. It was SO worth it. Asher, though small and mostly unable to keep up, loved the hike. I could tell that he loved it because he talked the whole time. Nobody understood what he was saying, but it was definitely joyful chatter. Audrey did a great job holding daddy's hand for support, but she is sure-footed and did not complain once. She was wonderful with
warning Asher and me about things to watch out for on the trail (she and Eli were quite a bit in front of slow-moving Asher and I). After the hike, we went to the cookie cabin in the nearby town, Summerhaven. They make plate-sized cookies and put ice cream on top should you desire that much sugar! Audrey and I shared the chocolate chip and Asher and Eli shared the peanut butter. Next time, we'll just get one cookie since two was way more than we could eat. I still have left-overs in my refrigerator. So, here a few pictures from that day.

There were several fallen trees, but this one was right on the path. So Audrey, Callan and Eli posed for a photo opp! 

Audrey actually found this treasure, but she let Asher carry it during the entire hike, along with her treasure bag (purse). 

This is where the hike ended for us as we were trying to get back to the cookie cabin before it closed at five. I grabbed a few branches to set up the timer on the camera. The running back and forth between the camera, uphill to the rock was a workout. It took probably ten tries to make sure we got a decent picture.

The other big thing this week was Callan's six month birthday! This baby boy is rocking my world and I am astounded at how a mother's love can just grow and grow with each new child. 

He's pretty much the happiest baby ever!

Love that squishy little body and he loves this toy! 

Sum It Up Saturday!

Here's to another week of homeschooling! Well, sort of. I don't know if "Around the World in 60 Days" really counts as homeschooling since the lessons are SO short, but we try to make the most of them. This week was spent in the "Down Under!" The first country we visited was New Zealand where we learned that the sheep population outnumbers the people population by six to one! That's a lot of sheep. The accompanying Bible passage was the one that talks about the shepherd leaving his herd to look for his one lost sheep. So, we pretended we were all shepherds and looked for our lost sheep that daddy hid in the back yard.

Here is Asher diligently searching for the lost sheep! 

Sheep like greenery, which is hard to find in our dirt pile.

Maybe it likes to burrow in the dirt. Better dig! (Don't ask me why my sweet daughter is wearing the warmest possible outfit in triple digit weather. She was born in the desert, maybe it's in her blood.)

Around the corner?

Still searching! 

Aha! After several minutes of searching, and a few hints from mama, our lost sheep was found! 

Can you find New Zealand? I love seeing Eli so involved in what the kids are learning. He's truly a natural teacher.

We also looked at Australia and Papua New Guinea and had equally fun times learning about those countries.

While doing some research, we discovered that the homeschooling program that we're looking into strongly recommends that parents wait for children to be six years old before starting homeschooling, even if they are advanced. Let me tell you, Audrey is incredibly advanced in reading. She rarely needs help sounding out words and can read chapter books on her own. Since this program focuses on reading a lot once you get started, we decided to take their advice and continue what we're doing for the reading part. Besides, there are other areas that we can work on while we wait to start the actual program.

As evidenced by last week's post, Audrey needs help with hand writing. So I found a book at target with those writing guidelines so she could practice. This one also had indented letters which makes it easier to keep her marker on the right path to form a letter. She has only done six letters, but they are LEGIBLE which is very exciting for everyone. Our goal is to finish at least one page by the end of next week, and I will post a picture of her work.

Check out Jenny's blog for the original Sum it up Saturday posts, and feel free to provide input and guidance on my blog!

Sum it up Sssss-Unday

My intention was to join my sister Jenny, in blogging about our home school week on Saturday, which she calls, "Sum it up Saturday." Well, yesterday got away from me, so here I am today with a short blog about our minor dabble in home school this week. Eli and I are researching options and discussing how to go about home schooling. We're positive that we do want to keep the kids home and teach them ourselves, but we don't have a clear path yet. So for now, to keep our very intelligent daughter's mind active, we just do little activities as opportunity arises. 

Audrey really wanted to do some math with the abacus. After a while of just speaking some simple equations for her to figure out, I decided to give her a worksheet. It worked out better than I hoped since when it was done, she was ready for another activity, and had a sense of accomplishment. I think she thrives off of the completion of a task. I decided to keep all the equations working with the number nine. She then chose random numbers to add and subtract, and I wrote them out for her. 

Here she is writing down one of her answers. I love the look on her face. 

Asher and I watched with enthusiasm as Audrey worked out problem after problem. 

The hands-on work with the abacus is great, I think. I'm not an educated teacher, but I am pretty sure hands-on is the way to go, at least for this very busy child. 

Audrey proudly displaying her work. Okay, so her writing needs a little help, but she's only four. There will be time for that, and she got every answer correct.

The other thing we are starting today (which was also supposed to have been done yesterday) is a program called "Around the World in  60 Days." It includes the study of different countries around the world, and how we can pray for them, even though we're so far away. I hope this spikes our determination to teach our kids at home and helps us learn a bit more about what works and what does not work for Audrey. Although, each "lesson" is pretty short, so I don't know how much we'll learn from it about teaching. At the very least, it will be a fun activity, and will lead to more investigation about these different countries. 

The Fruits of the Spirit and the War Within

My parents' main form of discipline for me when I was a child, was a mixture of yelling, name calling (mostly "stupid") and disappointed looks, sighs and grunts. It has become clear to me that it is so true what they say about how a child learns. A child learns by watching the behavior of the people they spend the most time with. Like it or not, I learned how to treat young children, from my my parents, even though I hated how I was treated. To this day, I hate to be yelled at, and I hate using the word stupid. It is one of the non-curse words that my kids are not allowed to say in any context (not even when referring to an inanimate object like a rock.)
Despite my dislike for how I was disciplined as a child, that is what I learned. It is ingrained in me, and what I know. It's how I naturally operate as a parent, and I hate myself for it. It's like I can see the damage occurring to my children as it happens, but I am powerless to stop it. Now, please don't think that I just absolutely fly off the handle and scream at them until my voice is hoarse. What happens is, I raise my voice to tell them something. My yelling doesn't last long, usually just a sentence or two, but it is wholly unnecessary and way too frequent. I don't want my children to talk about how their mother yelled a lot. "She was really loving," I can hear them saying sometime in the future, "but she yelled a lot for things that were not a big deal." Don't my children deserve to have the best parent possible? Yes! The thing is, it's in my heart to treat them more kindly and with more fairness, (they are kids after all), but something in me, the side of me that is naturally drawn to sin and evil, just keeps flaring up when my kids show their imperfections. I know God wants what is best for us, and I was losing the battle to do right over wrong. I needed to change something.
I had begun getting up before the kids, or at least trying to. Sometimes they get up at an ungodly hour, and there is no hope of recovering my morning. On the days that my plan works though, I am able to get up, and do some Bible study while having a cup of decaffeinated coffee. (I look forward to have caffeine again some day, but the wee one is very sensitive to it in the breast milk, so for now, it's decaf. Somehow, it's still comforting and helpful.) For a long time, doing just that was enough to help keep myself even tempered and prepared to face the battle within. I noticed myself yelling less at my children, even though the urge was still there. I was able to keep it together just enough to not yell for the moment. But as of late, I've needed more than that. For years I have asked God to help me be a better parent. With the recognition that God gave me these children, I would plead that I showed them who Jesus is, and be loving like Jesus. The problem is, I am  already loving. As a "feeler" by nature, loving my children was never the issue. As intense as the yelling can seem, I love my children even more fiercely and they can tell. I needed help. I needed a new prayer.
This is one the things that I will remember as God working in my life, without my knowledge, just to bless me. I think the Holy Spirit went to God on my behalf and spoke about my need for change. The reason I say this is because, I did not think of praying for the fruits of the Spirit on my own. It just came to me, and I am so thankful that it did.
I began to pray fervently for the fruits of the Spirit. Not just in general, "Lord, fill me with your Spirit." No, I prayed specifically for gentleness, kindness, patience and self-control. On the very first day of this prayer, I saw God working in me! (I don't know why I still get surprised when I see God doing work in me.) The yelling ceased almost completely. The exasperated eye roll and heavy sigh, a usually hourly (at least) occurrence was gone. The bad attitude that was my constant companion, was replaced with gentleness, kindness, patience and self-control. Instead of yelling, "What did I just say?" in answer to a question that was just asked, I would respond with, "I've already answered that question." There are many examples that I could give to demonstrate the turn-around, but suffice it to say that I was astonished and so thankful for the gift that was clearly given from God. I continued to pray throughout that day and the next. But over the next several days, it slipped my mind to pray specifically for those things. The results were not good, and that is why I call it a battle, a war.
On one side is myself, and the devil whispering to me, "you're a great mom. You're not as bad some parents are, that's for sure." Trying to convince me that asking God for help is not necessary and a waste of time. Isn't that just like the devil. He speaks to us where he knows we can easily falter. Since I want to be the best mom I can for these amazing children, he lies to me and tells me I am, when clearly, I need some work. On the other side, is God. He desires to fill me with His Spirit, and He has given me a way to have that. But I must first deny myself. I deny that I am a "good enough" mom and especially that I am a "great" mom. I deny that I can do this by myself, that it is in my nature to be awesome. Instead, I seek God's strength, perfected in me. I ask for His Spirit where I am weak.
My prayer alongside of this transformation is that it's not too late. My oldest child is only four years old, maybe she won't remember much about the yelling. Maybe she will only see God working in me, and my dedication to asking for that help and remember it when she is tempted to treat her children unkindly. Maybe she and my boys will know that I must have struggled, but will praise Jesus' name that He is faithful to do good works in us, for those who love Him. I pray that my children will see Jesus more clearly, and will learn to earnestly seek Him in all their endeavors. I pray the my children learn from my behavior as a daughter of Christ, and not from behavior as a sinner.

You Can Just Call Me "Audg"

My daughter is amazing. She definitely was not planned by me, but God allowed me to be blessed through her birth and life. Her name is Audrey and she is incredibly smart. At four and half years old, she is reading books by herself. She doesn't always get every word correct, but she is easy to teach and she learns quickly when corrected. One of her brothers' name is Asher, whom we sometimes call "Dash" for short. Audrey doesn't really have a nickname, but one day she told us we could just call her "Audg," which of course we find adorable.

Audrey at about 18 months. I call this her "Vogue Pose" though she didn't really try to pose for the picture.

Second birthday party in her (okay, my) favorite green eyelet dress from Aunt Miss.

Dancing at a friend's wedding.

Christmas 2012, hanging the new ornament from Grammy.

This girl is always happy! She wakes up in the best of moods and I often have to catch up to her energy. She truly treats every single day with a new joy. It's like nothing ever in her life has gone wrong before when she wakes up in the morning. This is good for me, because sometimes I am a little hard on her. (Confession from a learning-how-to-do-it mama.) I know the day will come when she will remember the events from the day before, so I am working hard on being outrageously happy right along with her. After all, we do have quite a lot to be thankful for.
Lately, my favorite thing about her character is watching her utter trust and belief in Jesus. It is so amazing to watch the fruition of Jesus' teaching about believing like a child. There is no doubt in her mind that not only does God exist, but He is who He says He is, and does what He says He will do. Faith like a child is exemplified in her. I pray she keeps that faith through all of her years.

When My Son Dances

It is just so stinkin' cute! He could be doing any other activity (usually copying his older sister because whatever she is doing must be fun) and when he hears any type of music, he will stop and start to dance. He bounces up and down, though not necessarily to the beat, which just makes it even more adorable. And he waves his arms. Sometimes he claps. Sometimes he spins. Whatever moves he decides to bust out just make my heart burst with love for him.
It is such a joy to see my son developing physically. He's had medical issues, nothing terminal, but enough to make his development quite a bit slower than normal. The doctors think that cognitively he is fine, but he is almost two and still wears twelve month clothing. For a while, he wasn't even on the growth charts. Talk about scary. It is now written in his charts, "Failure to Thrive." It truly breaks my heart that he has suffered in this way (and other ways). He still has issues and is looking surgery in the face soon. However, in many ways, he is just like any other two year old.
He expresses every single emotion he is having, whenever and wherever he has it. Often these days, it feels like his only emotion is frustration. I can understand why. He is wanting to participate in life on a more independent level, but does not have the words to use to tell us what it is he wants or needs. He is delayed in speech and I fear that these "terrible twos" will last for an extended year. As much as I understand, I have two other children to care for and I can't always respond to his tantrum. Nor do I think it is appropriate to coddle him. He has to learn to find a way to communicate that does not involve screaming and crying. (He used to throw himself on the floor, too, but quickly learned that when the head meets tile in a battle, the tile wins.) I will bring this up to his speech therapist when we see her next. For now, it is constant reminders, "What do you want?"and, "Use your words." Maybe this emotional display, which feels constant at times, it why I enjoy so much watching him have fun.
His love for music and for dancing brings life back to the simple joys. It is these joyful times that I cherish and dwell on. He is such a sweet boy, and watching him go through this inability to speak clearly is really difficult. (As a side-note, my daughter was and is very verbally advanced. At four years old, she is reading entire books by herself with help only on new, big words that she hasn't seen before. So watching my son not be able to communicate clearly is a first for me.) He loves his older sister and his baby brother. He LOVES to "guggle" (snuggle) with his blanket in mommy and daddy's lap. He follows his sister around the house, or park, or church, or anywhere we go. It's so cute to watch him learn how to be a kid, from another kid.
As his second birthday approaches, I reflect on our happy anticipation of our sweet boy. We were so excited to be parents again. We couldn't wait to see what gift God had in store for us. And He did not disappoint. Our son has been the most challenging child so far. (We'll see how little brother holds up, but so far he's been the easiest.) Most of those challenges were health related. It was difficult to focus on the wonder of him for a long time because I was so worried about his health. However, when I lay aside my worry, and look at him for who he is, I am overwhelmed with love. He is precious to me, and I wouldn't trade him for health any day. I feel honored and privileged to be given the responsibility of raising this magnificent boy.
Lord help me to show him You!

Still working on tummy time at 10 months.

Fun at a wedding.

Asher is playing "Doctor" with his sister. The hospital gown is from when he had surgery. I am not sure we were supposed to keep it, but it ended up going home with us and serves as a reminder of God's faithfulness with all that he's been through.

He has the best sad faces. I personally love the huge crocodile tear, lol.

He has a sweet disposition and is usually very tolerant of his eye patch.